what's on my heart today...

...is this:

"Heaven is not here, It's there. If we were given all we wanted here, our hearts would settle for this world rather than the next." -Elizabeth Elliott

i remember a story, and i don't even remember who i heard it from...but there was a couple who had been overseas, for missions i think. they had been gone for a long time. as they arrived back to the States the wife was sad because no one was there to welcome them home...and then her husband said, "it's okay. we're not Home yet."

there's another quote, too, that's brought to mind...by C.S. Lewis. it reads:
"If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world."

yeah....THAT. THAT is what the wondrous Lord is putting on my heart today.

"they say that a journey of a thousand miles starts with the very first step"

this week has been exhausting. i can't say that i exactly got the much-needed rest. so as far as getting some sleep...well...i'll do that later. over christmas, maybe? :) no, but seriously. but today i rest in the Lord, because that is the only place to find the rest i need.

i admit this week i've been pretty weak and lonely. at times i got kind of peeved at my family, which is sad, because all they wanted to do was hang out with me. but i was up to my ears in work and felt like screaming because i just didn't see a way of finishing it all. and what happened? i was so busy worrying i didn't finish. like i said, i didn't let myself rest this week. i also didn't get to see many of my friends, and then only for short periods of time. i pretty much isolated myself. i must say i've been pretty foolish. so, yeah...i'm sorry. i apologize for my foolishness and for keeping myself locked away in my room stressing about homework.

on a lighter note...our family had a lot to be thankful for this year. i mean, a lot. yes, there is always plenty to be thankful for. but we have really been blessed in our circumstances...my father has been through nothing short of a miracle. my mother is recovering from her surgery, slowly. and in so many other ways, we have been truly blessed. sure, we are not through some of the storms yet. but we have been delivered through storms before and will be delivered again. so, yes, my family and i are very thankful. and always will be.

praise God that He continues to bring people into my life who encourage me in my walk, and who i can be glad to have spent this part of the journey with. can't wait to see where i have left to go.

the beauty of the Lord!!!!

God is beautiful in so so many ways.
tonight i got to see His lovely art displayed across the heavens in the meteor shower. it was gorgeous, and i have to admit the whole situation was not what i expected. because, frankly, i expected to just be sitting alone with my roomie chatting away until the wee hours and watching the gorgeous shooting stars. but instead the Lord presented a wonderful opportunity. our suitemate, who is absolutely amazing, was with us in our room before we left and we invited her to come along. so we got to hang out with her and get to know her better! she's so sweet. love that girl. we also made some new friends at the observatory where we watched the meteors fall...even though we couldn't exactly see each other's faces. haha. but we made some great memories tonight. viewing God's mighty works in all their splendor together, and enjoying each other's company. i can't wait to see how those relationships develop after tonight, too.

and oh, how beautiful His masterpiece was! if possible i have fallen even more in love with my marvelous Creator. i finally got to reflect upon some things tonight as i gazed at His beauty...and always the conclusion is that the Lord's name is to be praised! that i am viewing things as so much smaller than they are...(don't i need to remember THAT more often.)

i have a piece of artwork that was given me by my friend, which hangs on the wall above my laptop. it has the night sky lit with stars, and written all around it is Revelation 6:12-13...in fond memory of a wonderful conversation we once shared. a conversation about how, for lack of a better word, awesome it is to think that we have set before us all of this glorious work of the Lord...His beautiful creation...in which even each star is called by a name. that's how much He cares for it. and one day, all of it, every last bit, will come down in flames; it will all be destroyed...to make way for--get this--a Kingdom far more marvelous, far more beautiful. a Kingdom that will never end. new heavens and a new earth...and it is all going to be BETTER. i don't know about you, but i thought this was pretty stinkin amazing. i am pretty awestruck already at the Being Who can make what we have before us. but the Kingdom He is preparing...well, this doesn't even compare to it.

shakeadoo. what a mighty, awesome, BEAUTIFUL God we serve! and how i love Him! for i know that He loves me.
thank you, Lord, for such a day as this one! and for every day before and after! Your name be praised unto eternity! :)

NOW EVERYBODY DANCE! :)

i could sing unending songs of how You saved my soul
well i could dance a thousand miles because of Your great love

my heart is bursting Lord
to tell of all You've done
of how You've changed my life and washed away my past
i want to SHOUT IT OUT
from every rooftop sing
for now i know that God is for me, not against me!

i could sing unending songs of how You saved my soul
well i could dance a thousand miles because of Your great love!!!

meteor shower!!!

okay so check this out:

http://www.cnn.com/2006/TECH/space/11/17/leonid/index.html

yeah, fine, i'm a nerd. but i'm SO gonna be watching this. talk about AWESOME.

w00t. :)

"and suddenly it isn't what it used to be..."

-i couldn't be more glad with how much writing i've gotten to do recently. the more i write...the more i want to write. and i love it. i think right now if i could have a whole day to do anything...it would be to sit outside in the midst of God's glorious creation writing and singing.
-yesterday was the most restful day i have had in a while. if looked at from outside it would appear like another one of my normal, busy days. but it was a different kind of rest. rest in the Lord, even if i have to be running around like a crazy person getting things done. and boy, did i rest well. still resting. :) (oh, and dancing too. don't forget the dancing.)
-i am aching for some new music. i love the music i have, obviously...but every once in a while if i don't find something new i just...ache. to add to the music that i have. that's another thing i wouldn't mind doing with an entire day...just go listen to new music, stuff i've never heard before...all day long. rock out to some new tunes. :) ooh! i am really in the mood to go to a concert. it's been oh so long. sorry. RANDOM.
-i am now fairly confident that i could point out the andromeda galaxy in the night sky. yes, i'm a nerd. but it's cool to be able to say that.
-today is going to be magnificent. because my Lord is magnificent. and all of myself is rooted in Him. so, depending on my magnificent Lord, i know i can look forward to a day in which i can live to glorify Him and praise His name with every breath. :)

<3kay

guess what?? it's time to dance.

i've come back to the passage in Ecclesiastes a lot this semester..about how there's a time for everything...

recently i've gone through a period of time that was definitely for mourning. i definitely can't say that it could be isolated to one particular reason, either. but it was a time for mourning.
while not memorable as the greatest time in my life, it was good and healthy. because there's a time for that stuff too.

and now, after all of it, i can confidently say that it is time to dance. i'm thinkin a nice jitterbug would be good. :)

so, yeah, um...

some of my dad's coworkers sent flowers today, and this is what they had written on the card. i love it:

"Remember, God heals and the doctors take the fees."

to keep you all updated:

my dad's surgery was successful. he is of course only in the beginning stages of recovery, but he is doing well. we are so blessed to live in a time and place where we have doctors and medicines so readily available. it is awful to think that my dad might have been just days away from a heart attack...and for that matter, by all logic there's no reason he should have escaped having one thus far. but the Lord provided so abundantly, as He always does. Praise God!

goodnight loved ones...i'm so tired.

a quick note to ask for your prayers...

loved ones...
my dad has been having some heart problems lately. it worried me from the start because, well, why wouldn't it? but i didn't know exactly how serious it might get. he went in for a fairly routine procedure today so that the doctors could see just how bad the blockage in his arteries is. one artery is 100% blocked and another is partially blocked. it was all explained to me very quickly and over the phone...but it's basically a miracle of God that he is alive. the doctors attempted to put a stint in the artery but there was a very high risk of blasting it open, resulting in need for emergency surgery. so instead, they decided not to do the stint. tomorrow morning my dad will undergo double, if not triple bypass surgery to remove the blockage in his arteries.
i won't deny that this scares me. i won't tell you that i'm completely fine with the situation...who could be? but i do trust in the Lord who has delivered us faithfully thus far, and will continue to do so. His will will be done. i am blessed enough to have circumstances which allow me to go home tomorrow morning and be with my dad around the time he wakes up. that, along with so many other things, i count as joy. and the joy of the Lord shall be my utmost strength in this time when i, admittedly, feel very weak.

<3 kay

...the songs in my head...

mercy is falling is falling is falling
mercy is falling like the sweet spring rain
mercy is falling is falling all over me
(over me over me over me!)

hey oh i receive Your mercy
hey oh i receive Your grace
hey oh I WILL DANCE FOREVERMORE!!!


i have had that song stuck in my head since last night. i felt like sharing...hope you enjoy. :)
i love God!!!!!!

ooh sister act.... i love Him i love Him i love Him and where He goes i'll follow i'll follow i'll follow....
haha LOVE IT!!!

i think i'm gonna go dance and sing the day away cause GOD IS SO GREAT! my God is so BIG so STRONG and so MIGHTY there's NOTHING my God cannot do!!!!

"shoes. shoes. shoes. OMGSH! shoes."

...i love being a music major. i'll take all the difficulties any day if it means i get the rewards too.
...i want to apply to pine cove for next summer, as a counselor this time. and i'm terrified to. sometimes it's good to do things that we are really afraid of. i'm REALLY afraid to do this. but i also REALLY want to do it.
...i will admit that i did exactly what i hoped i wouldn't do my first semester of college--i took on too much too soon. and it has had consequences. but thank the Lord, He is gracious, and picks me up when i fall. so i'm patching things up, one wound at a time.
...it is amazing the joy that can be given even in the darkest of times. i can look back, especially this year, on some of my darkest moments and note the incredible JOY that i had. maybe not initially...but through the worst of circumstances i have been brought into a more intimate relationship with my Savior and found joy and hope in Him and Him alone. the dark times still happened...storms still come...but i have my Savior--He is my rock and i can stand firm with Him even through those storms.
thanks to those who encourage me daily to walk by faith. i love you!