"there's something about you--it's just the way you move, the way you move me..."

so...i'm pretty awful at the whole self-discipline thing. i think i may have been better at it at one point in my life, but i'm really not good at it right now. i need to work on that. a lot. or rather...i need to let God work on that. a lot. i guess that's just one closet of my heart i haven't opened the door to for Him yet. so, this is me, opening it. i want to be renovated.

i think i'm pretty bad at loving people, too. i mean, i don't hate the world or anything like that. but i don't think i love as well as i should--the verb, not the emotion. i know i am called to love. i just don't always do it. of course, none of us humans ALWAYS love, and i'm pretty sure none of us has actually loved perfectly. that's kind of a God thing. but i would like to love more perfectly. more completely. you know...lay-down-my-life-for-another kind of love.

there's a very long list of things i'm bad at. i could list them all day and focus on myself and my inadequacies. or i can turn my eyes upon Jesus, knowing that He overcomes all my insufficiencies and uses me for His glory. which, frankly, is pretty much amazing. not just amazing...captivating. i'm captivated by my Saviour. pretty cool stuff, man.